An airline pilot Is walking his dog Along a canal towpath Near Tring In Hertfordshire. A large fish Pokes its head out of the water. The dog...
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Sunday, February 27, 2005
Friday, February 25, 2005
Underpants
His underpants are uncomfortably tight. He considers the position. Either he can remove his underpants And replace them With a more commodio...
Wednesday, February 23, 2005
Gender confusion
A large badger Walks into a delicatessen in Ludlow, Shropshire. The woman behind the counter Looks at him. "I'm a female badger, No...
Tuesday, February 22, 2005
Contact
She looks into a mirror. A female wolf looks back. Several hundred miles away In the Arctic circle, A female wolf looks into a mirror. A fem...
Monday, February 21, 2005
Toytown
Bigears pulls a large, black bible Off the shelf. "According to John's Gospel, Chapter three, Verse 38, Noddy, Your attitude is uns...
Sunday, February 20, 2005
School run
It was not easy To shave her legs, While driving a car Full of children On the school run, While making a call On her mobile To the hairdres...
Synchronicity
A bald man Is fly-fishing On the banks of the River Tweed At Berwick. The periscope Of a nuclear submarine On Nato exercises Breaks the surf...
Friday, February 18, 2005
Student life
He is rushing To complete An essay. It has to be handed in, At the latest, By 4.30pm A week ago last Friday. Further delay is out of the que...
American Dream
The burger bar Is full of fat People, With fat Food-filled faces, And fat Food-filled figures, Filling up With more Fat, food-filled food. T...
Tuesday, February 15, 2005
The police are very good
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Monday, February 14, 2005
Tell me a little about yourself
A small boy knocks At the Headmaster's door. "Come in." "I'm a new pupil at the school, sir. I thought that I would c...
Sunday, February 13, 2005
Cheese sandwich
He feels like a cheese sandwich. There is no cheese in the fridge. He looks in the mirror. He looks like a cheese sandwich. There is no chee...
Pope terror talks
The Pope meets Osama bin Laden At a hunt ball In Sunderland. There are smoked lobster canapés With a creamed spinach topping. The Pope says:...
Saturday, February 5, 2005
Jesus is not an icon
Jesus is not an icon Of repressed purity, A perfect butterfly Officially pinned in position, Secured beneath museum glass, For the safety Of...
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